When you are faced with a daunting task it\u2019s easy to get discouraged. And it\u2019s easy to express discouragement, doubt, dismay, fear and other negative emotions through negative self talk. Examples:<\/p>\n
“I can’t do this.”<\/p>\n
“There’s not enough time\/money\/hands to do this.”<\/p>\n
“I don’t know how and I can’t learn how to do it.” etc.<\/p>\n
The problem with this is that it amplifies the discouragement<\/em>. It sets the negative belief in stone as a \u201ctruth\u201d that then becomes even more daunting and ultimately impossible to overcome. Then it\u2019s more than discouragement, it\u2019s failure.<\/p>\n There’s nothing like failure to torpedo self esteem: \u201cI can\u2019t even do X (whatever the daunting task was).\u201d<\/p>\n On the other hand, there\u2019s nothing like success to build and reinforce self esteem. But, how to succeed?<\/p>\n First, start with the easy things. If you have three things on your plate, and one is really daunting \u2013 start with the easier ones. Build up momentum from successful accomplishments before tackling the harder task.<\/p>\n Break down the task into its component parts. It is very likely that some of the parts are easier. Start with those!<\/p>\n Be realistic about the difficulties. Figure out what you don\u2019t know how to do, or where certain resources may be lacking.<\/p>\n Brainstorm. Get creative.<\/p>\n Ask for help. Other people may have ideas or resources you\u2019ve not thought of. There is no shame in asking for help. People enjoy offering their assistance.<\/p>\n Realize that everything worth doing is only accomplished step by step. Mistakes are not dead ends, but new opportunities to get creative.<\/p>\n At every step of the way, pay attention to what you are saying to yourself. When you notice negative self talk, change it to positive talk. For example, when you are stuck it may be tempting to say, \u201cI can\u2019t do this.\u201d Change that sentence to \u201cI can do this.\u201d Doesn\u2019t that feel different?<\/p>\n If that feels difficult to say, try something like, \u201cI\u2019m not sure if I can do this, but I\u2019m trying.\u201d Or: \u201cI want to learn how to do this.\u201d<\/p>\n Making this small shift in self talk can pay large dividends. Negative self-talk guarantees failure. Positive self-talk opens the door to possibility.<\/p>\n Success is created out of possibility.<\/p>\n Self esteem and self confidence are built upon successes, small and large.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When you are faced with a daunting task it\u2019s easy to get discouraged. And it\u2019s easy to express discouragement, doubt, dismay, fear and other negative emotions through negative self talk. Examples: “I can’t do this.” “There’s not enough time\/money\/hands to do this.” “I don’t know how and I can’t learn how to do it.” etc.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,4,7],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-17","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-building-self-esteem","7":"category-high-self-esteem","8":"category-self-confidence"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":55,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17\/revisions\/55"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/guidetoselfhelpbooks.com\/self-esteem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Steps to success<\/h2>\n
Use positive self-talk to create success and self esteem<\/h2>\n